Chapattis and Chimps

The horn of our transport woke me up Saturday morning. I had over slept, my phone's alarm failed when it ran out of charge over night. I swear electronic devices loss their charge faster in this area of the world.


I had already packed for a jungle excursion the previous night so ten minutes later I was showered and ready go, stuffing a big piece of mango in my mouth and downing a bottle of water. I've been very strict about drinking only bottled water, but have violated the rules regarding eating fresh vegetables (which can easily be contaminated when washed by tap water or not be washed at all) a number of times. So far the intestines have been happy though as have my pants.

First things first, the tour taking us on this safari needed to screw us over on pretty much every detail. The length of the drive (6 hours, not 4), the price of the tour (asking for an extra hundred for no particular reason, aka the muzungo tax), accepting only cash despite their website portraying happy travelers holding a credit card and giving a thumbs up. Some battles we won, threatening to walk on the price, others we were powerless to change. I had only minimal cash, my previous bank machine efforts had been disastrous and i had been too busy all week to find another option. We got it sorted and headed out a little after 7.

Traffic was light and the weather pleasant. Similar to our trip to the Nile, the highway alternated between open roads lined with tea fields and farms to small villages mined with sleeping p policeman (what they call speed bumps) to keep down what would no doubt be otherwise massive traffic casualties. Each village consisting of drab brick or wooden buildings punctuated by corporate sponsorship in the form of brightly painted shops or homes, turned into massive billboards. Many times the same company would be represented by three or more buildings in quick succession.

Cellular is big industry in a country where very few households have landlines. Even the smallest villages, hours off the main roads will have painted buildings and authorized dealers in the area. In some cases an entire block can sport these corporate colours.

Most activity in town was split between commerce and standing around. At one point we observed a large crowd yelling, their focus on something or someone at the centre. It was only when the crowd momentarily parted to allow several men armed with long spears in that I saw the limp and bloody body of a man. The driver saw the look on my face and reassured me that this was normal. "He probably is a thief, the crowd will beat him until the police show up". When I asked what the spears were for, he responded "oh, well sometimes they will just kill him before the police arrive, what ever comes first". His flippant nature my have been just to rattle me but I suspect these episodes of mob justice are not uncommon.

We made very few stops except for bathroom breaks or to allow one of us to buy a counterfeit, and nonfunctional phone card. At one of the stops we gathered around a street vendor making chapattis, at 500 shillings each (about 20 cents). They were also selling tasty looking samosa like items, but I could not understand what the filling was, I swear they said 'dog beans' which did not sound encouraging, so I cowardly avoided them. At one village our vehicle got stuck briefly behind a disabled truck. This prompted a swarm of people with various items to appear at our windows, stuffing kebabs, chapattis, bottled soda and fruit in our faces. I opted for a roasted banana and when i gave the man a single US dollar he proceeded to give me 4 more of the steaming snacks(they were good). After about four hours, our road changed from asphalt to dusty gravel and by midday we had arrived at Kibale National Park.

Some people may question the intelligence of a man who eats at a road side food stand in rural Uganda but I....have to agree with them. Regardless, the fresh made chapattis were great, often having bits of vegetables blended in to the dough. At least I think it was vegetable. Note the 'dog bean' samosas in the display case, top right. Sketchy.

A number of other foreigners were already  here for tours, which brings me to a concerning observation: Caucasians are disproportionately unattractive in this country, not just on this excursion but in Kampala as well. I mean, yikes. I realise this condemns me as well, but I cant argue with the data. I keep expecting the next van full of Europeans to dispute this finding only to reinforce it even hideously more. Africans must be standing around marvelling at how we got so homely. In any case, if you are travelling in Uganda, you may just be a bag of ugly, check a mirror and try to stay indoors, these people have enough problems.

They wasted little time getting out into the reserve. A quick buffet lunch, which included the regular fare of potatoes, curried peas and beans and a fantastic, but odd looking, purple dish called stewed ground nut (their name for peanuts). The purple I learned is the natural colour of the nut's skin before roasting. We attended a briefing and then got assigned in groups no bigger than six to a ranger/guide dressed in a paramilitary uniform each armed with an old rusty AK47. I assumed the rifle was for protection against aggressive animals, but in fact it was for poachers. Poaching is a serious problem for Ugandan. Their main targets are antelopes, wild boar and other game. They use snares and spears, very rarely do they carry firearms but that doesn't stop them from attacking rangers. The snares, nothing more than rope anchored to a stick with a slip knot, often catch primates. While not the intended target, the poachers will kill the trapped animal regardless to retrieve their snare. The consumption of monkeys and other primates is not common to Ugandans so the dead animal is cooked and fed to their dogs.

Africano, our guide the first day, always keeps his AK close by. The rifle is  a knock off though, Ugandan made and the reason Kalashnikov is having financial problems. If an ex-soviet weapons manufacturer can't stay in business, what chance do the rest of us have?

The jungle trek started mid afternoon. Kibale National Park is almost 800 square kms and boasts over 20 species of primates including baboons and chimpanzees, what they are best known for. The ranger lead us through increasingly diminishing trails. The high canopy stifled significant underbrush growth but vines, swamp and dead fall made off trail movement difficult regardless. The jungle was buzzing with life but it was not the exotic display of creatures one might think. Other than dozens of multicoloured butterflies, it was rare to see anything larger than mosquitoes.

One of the more groomed trails, this reserve made me think of the west coast trail immediately.

Our ranger would stop intermittently to listen for animal calls, occasionally contacting another ranger on an ancient wireless set to triangulate the location of the chimp herds in the forest. The chimpanzees travel constantly throughout the day, through the branches in the morning and by ground as the temperature rises. Their groups can be as big as two dozen or much smaller depending on the availability of food which mostly consists of leaves and fruit. At the beginning of the tour we were cautioned this park was an animal reserve, not a zoo, and there was no guarantee any of us would see a chimp or anything else. For the first hour it looked that may be the case but eventually our guide pointed out a group of red tailed monkeys skittering high above. We followed them briefly before a loud series of calls echoed a quarter of a kilometre away. Our guide lead a bandit rush off the trail through dense jungle until we came upon a mother chimpanzee and two children not 20 feet above. They lazily made their way from branch to branch, snacking on leaves and sending the empty twigs down on our head. Another single male, known to the rangers as 'the orphan' came within 3 metres of me to get at a fallen piece of modoro fruit, not unlike a mango, but not recommended for humans. I'll spare you the cliched "profound connection being so close to our closest genetic non-human ancestor". There is no doubt the experience was rewarding but it was purely one way. The chimp indifferently chomped away at his dinner, squeezing off a series of farts. With my flash off I snapped some great shots before he wandered off in the same direction as the others. Quietly following, the chimps eventually met up with other groups, which had been followed by other tours bringing us all into a gaggle. Evening was setting and the chimpanzees would now make nests, new ones each night, to sleep. We left them to their work.

This was from about 4 meters away. The chimpanzees move quick so getting a decent shot is difficult. Regular exposure to visitors has habituated these animals somewhat but the rangers are very strict about feeding, proximity and camera flashes. As a result, the chimps remain far from tame but do not scatter at the first sight of humans.

Rain came down us as we exited the jungle, making sure we were good and wet before climbing into our transports. Our accommodations was the Chimps Nest, about a 30 minute drive away. We were welcomed, filthy and stinking, but the staff with hot cloths and glasses of tart passion fruit juice. The resort was quite simple and restrained. A small but clean open air main house with seating for meals provided a beautiful backdrop of green valleys and hills. Our rooms were private two person cottages a five minute walk away, very sparse, with fire wood heated hot water and a semi outdoor bathroom attached. We had a nice dinner of simple carrot soup, entry, mine a vegetable souffle, but i saw no sign of the souffle part, and an insanely good fresh pineapple fritter for desert.

The main house of our billet in Kimbale. Carrying our luggage was as cushy as it got here but it was a pleasant stay all the same.

Weaver birds have taken over this tree and the dozens nests, which they enter form the bottom, have attracted small monkeys who fight with the birds for the eggs.

By 9:30 I was in bed searching my blankets for huge spiders and reviewing the 100 plus photos I had taken over the day. We had one more trek in the morning and then back to Kampala and planning for our work in the hospital during the next week.

I'll be in touch.